Driving Lessons

I just knew I had to do it too. I woke up to the roars of a motor vehicle one morning. I had just graduated from high school and was waking up later than usual. I narrowed my sleep groggy eyes towards the wall clock, it was 9am. So who in the world was stepping on the gas and scattering pebbles at this hour, right in front of my house??? Then came the familiar and popular honk........DII DOO DII DOO DEY. I flew high and out of bed. It had to be a friend of mine. I rushed outside the gates and came to an abrupt stop, it was G-Funk. She was driving her mum's car, their young mechanic was riding shotgun. I screamed. I mean....when and how did she learn to drive????? She gave me a thumbs up and pointed at her passenger then realisation dawned. The young mechanic had taught her secretly. I gushed and glowed green with envy. I had been begging my mum since the day I wrote my last paper to let me go to a driving school but the answer had always been NO. I just knew I had to talk to Pa.


That evening I did all the chores in the house, cleaned my parents' room and whatever I could lay my hands on. I made sure Pa saw me slaving away. When the coast became clear, I whined and cajoled Pa till he gave in. Yippee. He called my mum and told her I was ready for some driving lessons but he had no time on his hands to ferry me back and forth from a driving school. Mum thought for a moment, then decided to use one of the official drivers at her job. She mentioned one Mr Adeleke, an experienced driver with the road under his belt. I was so excited I couldnt sleep. I couldnt wait to get my hands on a wheel, though Pa used to let me hold the steering wheel anytime we went out together but that was nothing compared to really driving. I was in the skies, rolling and tossing till morning.

In the morning, mum announced that my younger brother was gonna take driving lessons too. I was generally pissed. I mean, I didnt want no kid tagging along. I wanted to drive before my brother even learnt where the gear stick was, I didnt wanna learn with him. Meeeeeeen....
Neways I had no say in the matter. Mum took us to meet Mr Adeleke. He was an elderly man in his late fifties, very close to retirement. He was short and wiry but seemed very nice and friendly.Mum handed us and her car keys over to him. He led us back to the parking lot and we all piled into the car. He turned to us and asked us to call him Baba Saheed not Mr Adeleke, he complained Mr Adeleke was too formal.

Baba Saheed drove for like forty-five minutes before driving into the gates of a high school. The place was deserted because the students were on vacation. He turned the vehicle onto the large football field, then he scooted to the far side of the seat and asked me to take the wheel. This was pretty easy because I had been doing precisely that with Pa before I was ten years old. I did pretty well before he stopped and asked me to manouver the gear stick. I guess I was overconfident and smiled ruefully. He started calling out the gear numbers
1........2......3......
At 3, I stopped I just couldnt get it. He asked my brother to do it and he did it so pretty well, I casted a suspicious glance his way. somebody must have been teaching him!! Then Baba Saheed turned to me again.
'' o ya fi oko si gear'' ( shift the gear into 1)
'' fi si gear keji'' ( shift it into 2)
'' fi si gear keta'' ( shift in into 3 )..........then the trouble started again
'' ha ha iwo omo yii, ki lo le ninu ko fi oko si gear keta'' ....... (this girl, what is so difficult into shifting the gear to 3) then he proceeded to demostrate.
'' gear 1, hoiiiiiii ''
''gear 2, hoiiiiii ''
'' gear keta, hoi hoi , o ya tun se...................................( do it again now).


The first day of driving lessons was a mess. My brother gloated at me. I had failed woefully. I improved a little with the gear thing the second day. By the fourth day, Baba Saheed had me on the main street. I was shaking with fear but he couldnt careless. He had told my mother he was gonna get us ready in two weeks. Two weeks ke???? Is somebody trying to turn me into a Miracle Micheal Schumacher overnight?? I was gripping the steering wheel like a life line with all eyes on the road when I suddenly sighted a group of friends walking alongside the road. For the life of me, I had not seen those girls in ages, Mum had turned me into a serious aboki. We were bloody due for a housemaid. I forgot about the driving lessons, I forgot about Baba Saheed, I forgot about my brother and mummy's car and I completely forgot I was driving on a main street. I threw my hands up and yelled in delight to my friends, they turned and saw me then yelled back in excitement.I was waving like crazy until a skull-breaking knock landed on my head, the car swerved crazily and Baba Saheed grabbed the steeering wheel, yelling at me to get my foot off the accelerator and march the breaks.

'' parkee oko parkee oko jare'' he yelled at me. ( park the car, park the car )
'' a ni ki o ju gear, o le ju'' ( you havent been able to down shift to three)
'' sugbon o le ju owo si awon ore re '' ( but yet you can wave at your friends )

I was shaking so badly, holding the head and I told Baba Saheed I couldnt continue but he wouldnt let me get down from the car,

'' iwo ti o wa oko de ibi naa ni o wa oko ku ro o, o si le sa lo o'' (You drove the car here, and you are still gonna drive, you cant run away!!!)


Good thing, he didnt tell my parents. Believe me Baba Saheed got us ready in two weeks, my mum couldnt believe it. Bad thing, she absolutely refused to let me near her car, she found out about the gear 3 problem and blaimed me for ruining her gear box. Neways I knew what I had to do, I made an extra copy of her key and got me a ride anytime I wanted one. I dared not go near Pa's car, it was too big neways, my feet wouldnt reach the pedals, pillows or no pillows. Mum would get really furious with me but she was the one who allowed an experienced and professional driver teach me how to drive in two weeks.

I now became the pro, I could drive to Kutuwengi though I didnt have a driver's license until ten years later. One day I tested Pa's car and with the help of a pillow, I was able to reach the pedals and drive it around town. I had a fantastic time honking DII DOO DII DOO DEY down G-funk's street. One day we tried to persuade Temmy to let us use her dad's mercedez to go hang out. She absolutely refused. Chicken!!!!