Friday, February 15, 2008

House of Commotion

Pheeewww......Its been a while, I know. Relocating is not an easy task, especially when you have to move kitchen wares. Last year I had gone to Linen and Things off Highway 6 to simply stroll away the time. It was one of those frigging boring days. I had gone back to the house with a trunk filled with Cuisinart Pots, Faberware Shogun-Like Knives,Microwave, Blender, Toaster.....Hamilton Beach seems to be in vogue. Cartons of dinner plates and silverware. So much for a stroll and so much for my bank account. I nearly collasped when I saw the bill but trust Yayi, I am simply obssesed with buying kitchen wares. I need to be given an award...lol
I had finished sorting out my clothes,shoes.....well those went to Salvation Army, when I remembered that I got some stuffs in the attic...meeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnn!!! I wished with all my heart that those Iya Paro women exist in the United States. I would have sold all my shoes, most of my clothes and half of the kitchen wares. I remember when I was growing up, TemmyTayo, G-Funk and I used to sell my mother's coca cola bottles and old shoes to those Iya Paro women, they would wanna give us a new plastic bucket in return but we always preffered the cash....to buy cheese balls. We had to stop when my mum noticed that the box filled with shoes was gradually losing its contents.
I climbed to the attic, grabbed a box of casserole dishes and gingerly stepped down. My big toe caught on one of the steps......yelp......and I rolled down the rest of the way. You should listen to my landing style. All my pilots friends would be green with envy. My landing on the pantry floor with the box as a parachute was so smooth, I felt like I had been dropped from the claws of a giant eagle onto some pine trees.I must have lost consciousness because the next thing I knew I was slamming into the washer and dryer. Devil sleep....yanga go wake am.Why in the world didnt I wait for my brother to get back from his job or something????? Superwoman!!! Neways I survived the crash but I am left with a badly sprained finger, its all bent and funny. I was shedding tears like a bush baby when my brother tried to massage and straighten it before putting a bandage on it. Hence....my absence.No finger to type.
I finally relocated to a beach town.A town filled with elderly people, sometimes I wonder if I had travelled back in time. They are everywhere, they wait tables, they are at the convenience stores, they check you out in Walmart and I am always like....these people aint supposed to be working meeeeen!!! They are supposed to be rocking their grandbabies on dem porches. Neways I am a housemate of four men. A big apartment, I have never seen one like it.I was given the Master bedroom....why because I am a LADY.....lol.
It took me just two days to blend in. I made up my mind I wanted to be treated like one of the boys. I did not want no special preferences but I got one before I even got to the house,....the master bedroom.In my short time here , I learnt the real meaning of family. These men are not related infact they are from different Nigerian tribes but you wouldnt know until somebody told you.One great thing about them is that nobody claims anything especially in the kitchen.....everything is for everybody. Damn, men are so easy to live with. They do their shit and you do yours. They mind their business, you mind yours. Well.....that is as long as you are not romantically involved with a man.
Sometimes I am at the receiving end of a weekend long teasing session. Initially I used to try to clarify things, defend myself and try to be the peacemaker in the arguments but now? HELL NO. I am now even worse...D called me a tout today because I felt he should have punched somebody first before giving the warning. I am having a wonderful time being a mate in the house. I guess that is what happens to you when you realise that you might spend the next six years in Iraq or in the Amazon fighting jet bombers and dodging land mines. Living with four men is nothing compared to Basic Training in the Army.
I am gonna miss them when I leave town again. Though it is a house of commotion, I love each one of them to pieces. I like their girlfriends too at least the ones I know...lol. I cant count how many T has,because he is always on the fone in low tones...dont know what the heck he is always talkng about.K is the master trouble shooter, intelligent,suave but you dont wanna be teased by him because you might wanna kill him. D is the quiet one but once he talks everybody rolls on the floor in gales of laughter. His ideas are different from everything and anything normal. A is my jogging partner....very nice and quick tempered.
They control the living room with the pads of the computer games and I control the kitchen with a big spatula...lol. Somebody asked me today if I was a girlfriend of one of these men and I said....well I am actually a girlfriend to the four men!! Her jaw dropped. She likes one of them....but I gotta approve first.lol
Ouch.....my finger!! The pain again...I gotta go!!!

24 comments:

Pink-satin said...

lol at selling stuff to iya Paro..me i used to sell old news paper and bottles to those people that went about shouting "i wan buy paper,wan buy gallon"..lol...good ol naija!

yayi said...

Lol.......''a n ra baber (paper) a n ra agolo o''
good ol Naija!!

Bubbles said...

are u in the military? I've been bouncing from blog to blog. I had to leave my blog becos of family members.

Sounds like u moved to florida, though i might be wrong. You are lucky in ur roommates. Not all guys are easy to get along with. My friend has 3 guy roommates, andi they are a bunch of little bitches (besides one so far). They expected her to be cooking for them and she was initially, but when she stopped that's when the wahala started.

Omosewa said...

Ahhh haba, e pelee, thats just wrong, ur fall i mean.

i wanro live with 4 hunkalicious men tooo, lol

anonymous gal said...

enyah u fell down.and i thot u had left blogville.

Risquediva said...

just gng thru...lik it so far...

rethots said...

...and the world (oops, even our immediate environment) would be a better place if we can just but, realise....we all can live together without anyone trying to change the other. Rather, appreciating that even in our differences (values, principles, beliefs et al) there can be harmony.

Ouch!!! you finger's supposed to be sprained; pele.

Allied said...

living with four men? wow.. i couldnt even survive one brother..

Welcome back

Omosewa said...

I hope you are A-ok now?

Allied said...

Where u dey now? are u still cooking for 4 men?

anonymous gal said...

yayi ere u at? hope u gud o

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

Howdy Yayi...hope all is well...


NIGERIAN CURIOSITY
IT WAS SO MUCH EASIER WHEN I ONLY HAD ONE...

Omosewa said...

Hellooooo

Oracle said...

Happy Easter.

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

Yayi! still no update?


NIGERIAN CURIOSITY
IT WAS SO MUCH EASIER WHEN I ONLY HAD ONE...

Celulite said...

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SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

hey yayi, where are you?????

bernard n. shull said...

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rethots said...

Hmmm,.....think thee not, update?

ONdLOW said...

Miss YAYI...Abeg update now....Haba. I am beginning to vex!

bernard n. shull said...

hi mate, this is the canadin pharmacy you asked me about: the link

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

hope all is well. haven't seen you around in ages.

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

where are you?

Don’t forget to join us in the online rally this Friday October 31st. Just use “FREE JONATHAN ELENDU NOW!” as the title of your blog post and FaceBook Status. Visit the Facebook page here or stop by Nigerian Curiosity.

Elendu is a Nigerian Blogger that was detained. He is now under medical care but is not free to return to his family in America. Hence the protest.

Take care!

deola said...

so cool!