What Men Want

This has been a horrible week. For starters I drove all the way from Texas to Georgia. Mapquest kindly informed me that the trip was gonna be 12 hours and 56 minutes. I left Houston at 5am, it was still dark and raining and all those trucks were going over the speed limit as if they had no breaks. I tried as much as possible to enjoy the first strecht of my trip with Sandra, my Honda Accord and my Alpine stereo blaring some much love country music. After two hours of straining my eyes to see through the windshield, I stopped at Beaumont, slept for half an hour then got down to get me some coffee at the Waffle House. My spirits were uplifted when the owner, an elderly black man greeted me so nicely and gave me a bear hug. Yes!!! Now I felt I was onto some adventure.


I was still in an adventurous mood when I left the state of Texas behind, then passed through the great swamps of Louisiana. There, it took a conscious effort to keep my mouth closed. I couldnt help but marvel at what God had created. The swamps were vast, miles and miles wide. I nearly stopped on one of the bridges, just to praise God, you know. The roads were not so good but I had an eyeful of swamps, Indian rivers, amazing bridges and lakes. Missisippi was a hundred mile and I did that in no time, crossing into Alabama. This was where I started getting tired and all adventurous spirits flew out of the window. I wasnt sleepy just tired of talking to myself. To make matters worse, it got really dark at exactly 5pm and I couldnt really see and so I had to be driving at 50m/hr.It was ridiculous. I was about 70 miles away from the state of Georgia when I saw this big placard with ''LIONS" on it. I wanted to pee so bad but that strecht of the road was the wildest wilderness I had ever seen in my life. I nearly stopped to pee though but that big placard changed my mind. No use getting chased by a lion with my pants around my ankles. What would be the use of running from a lion anyway?

I got to Atlanta at 10pm, then couldnt get down from the car. My right ankle was messed up and there was this raging pain in my lower back, you know like how expectant mothers in labour scream about that part of the body? Ok hot shower, Tylenol, and vapor rub did the trick.I slept off dreaming about lions and swamps. When I woke up the next day, my nose wouldnt stop running and I knew there was something wrong. Neways I came down with the most furious 'flu I ever encountered. Each breath was painful to the grind. I hated to be helpless like that but I couldnt do a damn thing to help myself.I had no relief until I took ALABUKUN two days after the whole thing started. Now, the fever is gone but I am left with an irritating cough. I thank God that I am even blogging tonight because the way I felt two days ago eeehhn, I thought I was gonna recover next month.

Being ill and confined to bed really made me think about some stuffs.

Whoever said that women are difficult to please?????? Excuse me and pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! I really had time to go over my youthful sojourn.

When I was 11 years old, all the boys in our neighborhood liked me and wanted me as a girlfriend because I could play soccer and was not afraid of getting dirty.
When I was 12, most of the boys did not like me because I could score more goals and outrun them in 100 meters race; I was the Red House Champion.
They suddenly liked me again when I sprouted boobs almost as big as my head and hated me immediately Pa stopped me from playing with them and I started wearing a bra.
The boys in high school liked me because I could dance and rap like them,knew all the lyrics of the songs by Naughty By Nature but they hated me because I wouldnt give out. Not even a kiss, Hell No!!
In college, the guys were crazy in lust and I didnt understand or see WHY!! Some said it was the daring attitude, some said it was my bouncy gait, some said it was the tomboyish thing..........yuck!! Well I have never seen myself as a male. I just do things my own way.
Halfway through college....some guys claimed it was my ability to take charge and take care of stuffs that drove them wild. One guy admitted to having a hard-on the day he saw me checking out the engine of a car. Some said it was the way I could jump start any car on campus or help a friend change a flat tyre. Now hold up....I did not study mechanical engineering in school, It was just the way Pa brought us up. Why would I pussy-foot around if I could do it myself??

Ok......I guess that was sexy to them right?? YUCK.

Now where do I get the feeling that men are actually scared of sharp girls?

You change tires...........you are a tomboy!
You wear decent clothes.............you are not sexy!
You are wild in bed.................you are a prostitute!
You dont think about marriage..............you are not focused!
You dont want sex....................you must be getting it somewhere else!
You want sex after marriage............you are old fashioned!
You dress like Beyonce.................you are trashy!
You wear Loreal........................you look like an Idian War Chief!
You wear french manicure...........that is why you can not cook!
You cook.........................and that is why he is getting fat!
You dare to be right............you are gonna be on your knees begging till daybreak!
You show some sexy moves..........you have started watching dirty movies without him!
You braid your hair..............it disturbs the sex!
You wear a low cut............."i love my woman with some hair"!
You are quiet..............you must be thinking of an ex!
You are talking..............you talk too much!
You make decisions............you have now become a man!
You are PMSing..........................you look like his grandmother!
You are smiling.....................you have a secret!
You are beautiful..............you are planning to run away with another man!

I can not go on o!
I KNOW THAT MEN ARE DIFFICULT TO PLEASE. Shikena

They do not have an idea of what they want!